Stargazer

Why does looking straight up at the stars make me dizzy? If I look at an angle, its not really that much of a problem, but tilt my head back just enough and WHAMO. Dizzy. Maybe WHAMO isn't really a "dizzy" sound...how about something like ZOOM or WIZZ? Those don't sound quite right either. I guess just use your imagination for what it sounds like in your head when you get dizzy. That's not the important part of the story anyway. Who really cares what the correct sound for "dizzy" is? So, an alternative to tilting your head back is to actually lie down in the grass and stare straight up, but then guess what happens. Chiggers. Ants. Grass Stains. Dirt. All sorts of unpleasantness. Thats why I usually choose to stare straight up, while I am standing. When I get dizzy (forget about the sound already) and feel like I am about to fall over (remember all the bad stuff that happens once you hit the ground...?) I just bring my head back to the normal position very slowly. I can probably repeat this stare-straight-up-and-return-to-normal process about 100 times before I get dizzy anyway, or just fall asleep. Thats why I want to learn as much about Ergoastronomics as possible. Then I can be a real, honest-to-goodness Stargazer.

Honest Farming

If I were an honest-to-goodness Farmer, as a job and a lifestyle (not just on the computer), you might think picking which plants to grow would be a very important and difficult decision. For example, depending on your climate and soil type, you might choose from several plants that grow well in those particular conditions, more than likely focusing on those that have the highest sale value. After all, we are in this to make money, right? Now, probably the plants that have the highest sale value are the most popular and delicious (we will just call them "cool" for simplicity): tomatoes, watermelon, cucumbers, marshmallows, peas, corn, potatoes, etc. So, if all the farmers only grew the most popular and delicious plants, in an effort to maximize their profit, why would anyone choose to grow the most unpopular and disgusting plants (we will just call them "nerdy" for simplicity): Brussels sprouts, rutabaga, anchovies, kale, etc. It is truly a mystery how so many of the "nerdy" plants have managed to remain in existence. If I were an honest-to-goodness Farmer, I would grow tomatoes because I like them the best. Plus I would vote that Farmers who chose to grow "nerdy" plants had to change to something "cool" as soon as possible.

Fixing It

Try to print a label. Label printer won't turn on. Its broke. Is it plugged in? Yep. Are all the cords hooked up right? Yep. Its broke. The boss'll buy a new one. Disconnect the old one. Its broke. Hook up the new one at the front desk. Take the old one back to the office. Its broke. Fix it. Solve the mystery, fix the label printer, print the label. Eat a banana.

Pudding and Yogurt

Sometimes I like to get a snack pack of Vanilla (nonbrandspecific) pudding and a one serving container of Vanilla (nonbrandspecific) yogurt to eat at the same time, in an alternating succesion of bites. The pudding seems sweeter, and the yogurt seems to have a deeper flavor. Perhaps this idea would work with other flavor combinations, but I myself am a plain vanilla guy. Enjoy yours today!